FRIDAY MOVIE QUOTE

"Cinderella story. Outta nowhere. A former greenskeeper, now, about to become the Masters champion. It looks like a mirac... It's in the hole! It's in the hole!"

-Carl Spackler (Bill Murray), Caddyshack (1980)

LIFE IMITATES STUPID

It's like Forrest Gump says, "Stupid is as stupid does."

Almost Game Over for Man Playing Real-Life 'Frogger'

Sometimes moving video games form the screen to real life can be fun and interesting, like the Pac Manhattan event. But 'Pac Man' is largely harmless. 'Frogger' on the other hand, makes for a much more dangerous game. And, no matter how funny you think the infamous 'Frogger' episode of 'Seinfeld' is, it's not a good idea to try and reenact it. Sadly, our advice is too late to stop a man from Clemson, South Carolina who thought it sounded like a great way to pass the time. His friend, who probably should have been trying to talk him out of it, shouted "go" as he began to pick his way across Highway 123. The man didn't make it to the other side. A Lexus SUV struck him, but, thankfully, didn't kill him.

OK, I have to ask. How does a 23 year old even know what Frogger is? He wasn't even born yet when this game was popular. What a dope. But hey, at least he got hit by a Lexus. Very classy.

If you really want to play Frogger, I'd suggest giving this version a try. No one will get hurt but the animated frog.

THIS DAY IN CRIME HISTORY: DECEMBER 30, 1905

On this date in 1905, former Idaho Governor Frank Steunenberg was killed by a bomb that was rigged to a gate at his home. While in office, Steunenberg took a tough stand against the Western Federation of Miners during a period of labor unrest. Former WFM member Albert Horsley (a/k/a Harry Orchard) was arrested for the crime. Legendary Pinkerton detective James McParland headed up the investigation. McParland pressured Horsley into implicating three high-ranking WFM officials as co-conspirators. Horsley was ultimately convicted of Steunenberg's murder, but his testimony against the other men was discredited. Two of them were acquitted at trial, and charges were dropped against the third. Albert Horsley was sentenced to death by the court, but the sentence was later commuted to life in prison. He died in prison in 1954 at the age of 87.

Further reading:

Wikipedia - Frank Steunenberg

Wikipedia - Albert Horsley

Find a Grave - Frank Steunenberg

JUST BECAUSE...

Something was telling me it was time for a gratuitous Claire Tully post.

THIS DAY IN CRIME HISTORY: DECEMBER 29, 1975

On this date in 1975, a bomb was detonated in a baggage claim area at New York's LaGuardia Airport. Eleven people were killed and seventy-five were injured. A Croatian nationalist emerged as a suspect, but there was never sufficient evidence linking him to the crime. The case remains officially unsolved to this day.

Further reading:

New York Times - Terrorist's Release Reopens Wound of Unsolved Bombing 

SEND LAWYERS, GUNS AND MONEY

Here's an unusual turn of events in a real-life heist yarn:

Bank sues for cash from heist

FARGO — A bank that lost $331,000 in an armored car heist in Bismarck earlier this year wants the money back.

U.S. National Bank Association has filed a lawsuit against North Dakota armored car company Alpha 6, Inc., and insurance carrier Lloyds of London. The bank is seeking restitution from the Feb. 23 theft in which two cash bags were picked up from the bank’s north branch in Bismarck, but never delivered to the main branch.

Authorities said the cash has not been recovered.

Matthew Fiechtner, Michael Link and Nathan Tuenge are charged in federal court with conspiracy to commit an offense against the United States and bank larceny. Fiechtner and Tuenge have both pleaded guilty. Link is scheduled for trial in March.

Fiechtner and Tuenge told a judge they spent the money, Assistant U.S. Attorney David Hagler said.

Spent the money? On what, hookers and booze? Actually, knowing today's youth, they probably blew it on video games and smart phones with 4G internet.

As for the lawsuit, the bank is going to have to prove that Alpha 6 had actual or constructive notice that they had crooks working for them, or that the company had engaged in negligent hiring practices.

The U.S. Bank lawsuit accuses Alpha 6 of negligence for the way it hired, trained and supervised its employees. The armored car company breached its contract by failing to perform criminal background checks on its employees, the lawsuit said.

Court documents show that Link was on probation for felony theft.

OK, I guess they may have a case here. But Alpha 6's response is kind of interesting:

Alpha 6 denies that it failed to conduct a background check on “the employee responsible for this theft” and said the company is not responsible for the incident.

So, are they denying that Link had a felony record? Or are they saying that hiring a guy with a felony theft conviction to work for an armored car company is OK as long as you do a background check on him first?

Then again, maybe the implication is that Link is innocent. I guess if he's acquitted, the company has a better shot of beating the lawsuit. That makes me wonder if they're paying for his attorney.

And speaking of lawyers, guns and money:

BABE OF THE WEEK

After a day of shoveling snow in the freezing cold--and more than freezing windchill--I'm ready for a long vacation in the tropics. But since I can't afford one of those, I figured maybe I can bring some of the tropics here. Brazilian-American model Suelyn Medeiros ought to do the trick.


Suelyn is known for having one of the best backsides in the history of backsides.


Of course, she has a pretty good frontside as well, as you can see here. For more of Suelyn, check out her official website, ILuvSueLyn.com


OK, here's one more pic of that famous back end, just to melt that last bit of snow.

FRIDAY MOVIE QUOTE

"Just once, I'd like a regular, normal Christmas. Eggnog. A fuckin' Christmas tree. A little turkey. But no, I gotta crawl around in this motherfuckin' tin can."

-John McClane (Bruce Willis), Die Hard 2 (1990)

HAPPY FESTIVUS!

Hey, I almost forgot that today is Festivus. I hope you folks who celebrate this strange and wondrous holiday have a great one. Remember to stretch and warm up properly before the Feats of Strength. You wouldn't want to pull a muscle on Festivus. And don't worry if you don't get around to everyone during the Airing of the Grievances. It's perfectly acceptable to include grievances on your Festivus cards. The video below ought to get you into the Festivus spirit.

CHRISTMAS WRAPPING

Here's a little bit of cheesy holiday goodness to set the mood for the coming holiday. It also serves as proof that some folks have too much time on their hands, but it's entertaining nonetheless.

THIS DAY IN CRIME HISTORY: DECEMBER 22, 1984

On this date in 1984, self-employed electronics repairman Bernhard Goetz just said no to subway mugging. Letting his gun do the talking, Goetz shot four unarmed men he claimed were trying to rob him. He fled the state after the shooting, but turned himself in nine days later in New Hampshire.

Goetz was tried for felony assault, attempted murder, and illegal weapons possession. He was acquitted of the assault and attempted murder charges, but convicted of the weapons charge, for which he served eight months in jail.

Following the criminal trial, Darrell Cabey, one of the men who was shot, filed a lawsuit against Goetz. The jury found Goetz liable for Cabey's injuries and awarded Cabey - who was left paralyzed by the shooting - $43 million. Goetz responded by filing for bankruptcy.

Since the shooting, Goetz has run unsuccessfully for mayor of New York, and for public advocate. He also founded his own company, appropriately named Vigilante Electronics.

Further reading:

The Eighties Club - The Subway Vigilante

Wikipedia - Bernhard Goetz

NY1 - December 22nd In NYC History

BABE OF THE WEEK

This week's babe is South African-born actress Charlize Theron.

THIS DAY IN CRIME HISTORY: DECEMBER 18, 1931

On this date in 1931, gangster Dutch Schultz finally got his wish. "Ain't there nobody that can shoot this guy so he don't bounce back?" Dutch once asked about his rival, Jack "Legs Diamond" Moran. Old Legs, whose other nickname was "Clay Pigeon," had this annoying habit of surviving assassination attempts.

By 1931, Legs had moved upstate to start bootlegging and narcotics operations. He spent the night of December 17th partying in Albany, after having just been acquitted in a kidnapping trial. He left his girlfriend, showgirl Marion "Kiki" Roberts around 11 PM, and went back to the boarding house on Dove Street, where he had been staying. Around 5:30 AM, two men entered the boarding house, went to the second floor room where Diamond was sleeping it off, shot him in the head multiple times and fled the house.

The murder of Legs Diamond remains unsolved, but there were multiple theories about who was responsible. Dutch Schulz was an obvious choice. Lucky Luciano was another likely candidate. Some think it was local Albany thugs, or that the hit on Legs was ordered by Dan O'Connell, the head of the notorious Albany Democratic Machine. The Machine not only controlled politics in Albany, they also ran the local rackets. And they weren't open to the idea of competition. This being the case, the hit may have been carried out by members of the Albany Police Department. Double-crossed ex-partners are always a good bet too, and Legs had some of those out there gunning for him. But I guess we'll have to wait for Pat Downey's next book to give us the straight dope on who offed Legs.

The picture above, which I took two years ago today, is of the house at 67 Dove Street in Albany, where Legs Diamond was killed. It now belongs to author William Kennedy.

Further reading:

Wikipedia - Jack Diamond (gangster)

Gangster City - Jack "Legs" Diamond

Albany Times Union - Mobster's 1931 murder remains unsolved

Brooklyn Daily Eagle - DIAMOND IS SLAIN AFTER ACQUITTAL

FRIDAY MOVIE QUOTE

"Horses ain't like people, man, they can't make themselves better than they're born. See, with a horse, it's all in the gene. It's the fucking gene that does the running. The horse has got absolutely nothing to do with it."

-Paulie (Eric Roberts), The Pope of Greenwich Village (1984)

THIS DAY IN CRIME HISTORY: DECEMBER 16, 1962

On this date in 1962 - the 25th anniversary of the Cole/Roe escape attempt - Alcatraz inmates John Paul Scott and Darl Lee Parker took a shot at busting out of The Rock. After bending the bars on the kitchen window, they made it to the shore and swam for it using inflated rubber gloves as makeshift water wings. Parker made it about 100 yards and stopped on a rock formation near the island. He was found there half an hour after the escape was discovered by prison officials. Scott was found an hour and a half after Parker, unconscious and suffering from hypothermia. He had made it to Fort Point, underneath the Golden Gate Bridge. After a stint in a nearby hospital, Scott was returned to Alcatraz. John Paul Scott is the only Alcatraz escapee who ever successfully swam to the mainland... that we know of.

Further reading:

Utica Observer - "2 Escape from Alcatraz; Freedom Short Lived"

Alcatraz History - Escape Attempts

THIS DAY IN CRIME HISTORY: DECEMBER 16, 1985

On this date in 1985, Gambino crime family boss Paul Castellano and his underboss/bodyguard Thomas Bilotti, were shot dead outside Sparks Steak House in Manhattan. The hit was reportedly carried out at the order of John Gotti, a captain in the Gambino family. Following Castellano's death, Gotti would take over as the family's teflon-covered boss. The teflon wore off in 1992, when Gotti was convicted of thirteen counts of murder, including those of Paul Castellano and Thomas Bilotti.

Further reading:

Wikipedia - Paul Castellano

Gangsters, Inc. - John Gotti

Sparks Steak House

YOU'RE A DOUCHEBAG, MR. GRINCH

There are assholes, and then there are assholes:

Grinch Burglar Steals Family's Dog, Christmas Gifts

A Mesquite family is off to a bad start to the holiday season after burglars stole its dog and all of its gifts over the weekend.

Thieves broke into the Rusaw family's apartment at Tri Pointe Square and stole a teacup Yorkshire terrier named Candy, wrapped Christmas gifts, electronics and jewelry.

Most of the stolen gifts belonged to 13-year-old Cameron Rusaw. But Cameron, who was too upset to go to school Monday, said he misses his dog more than anything.

"I'm not worried about any gifts," he said. "I just want my dog back."

Taking a 13 year old boy's presents was bad enough, but stealing his dog too? If the scumbags responsible for this grinchery are caught, they need to be sent to Singapore for a thorough caning of their backsides. And their frontsides too.

BABE OF THE WEEK

This week's babe is actress Emmanuelle Vaughier. Fans of Human Target might recognize her as FBI Special Agent Emma Barnes. She has also appeared in Covert Affairs, Two and a Half Men, and CSI: NY.

IS IT MEMORIAL DAY YET?

First we had the bitter cold of last week. Then came the freezing rain that turned my deck into a skating rink this morning. At this point I can safely say I'm thoroughly sick of winter. The sad part is that winter hasn't even officially started yet.

FRIDAY MOVIE QUOTE

"This job really isn't how, you know, shows like CSI make it out to be. When I first joined the force, I assumed there was semen on everything, and there was some huge semen database that had every bad guy's semen in it. There isn't, that doesn't exist... I often go to sleep and I dream of waking up in a world where everything is covered in semen."

-Officer Michaels (Seth Rogen), Superbad (2007)

THIS DAY IN CRIME HISTORY: DECEMBER 9, 1935

On this date in 1935, newspaperman Walter Liggett was murdered in an alley behind his home in Minneapolis. Liggett, editor and founder of a weekly newspaper called The Midwest American, published stories that exposed the links between government officials and organized crime. Liggett persisted, even after multiple warnings that included an assault and a trumped-up prosecution for a rape that never happened. On December 9th, Liggett's enemies took action to silence him once and for all: they shot and killed him as he returned home from a shopping trip that evening. Liggett's wife and 10 year old daughter witnessed the shooting. Mob boss Isadore "Kid Cann" Blumenfeld and one of his associates were identified as the shooters, but a (possibly intentionally) sloppy prosecution prevented their conviction.

Further reading:

"Hunt Gang in Slaying of Crusading Editor" - Brooklyn Daily Eagle, December 10, 1935

Stopping The Presses: The Murder Of Walter W. Liggett, by Marda Liggett Woodbury

Wikipedia - Walter Liggett

Wikipedia - Kid Cann

47

OK, question for you: Is 47 mid 40s or late 40s? Because mid 40s sounds kind of like middle age, while late 40s sounds more like... old. On second thought, don't answer that, I don't want to know.

Now that I'm 47, should I join the 47 society? It's an organization that "is dedicated to exploring the phenomenon that is 47." No, scratch that. Sounds like a waste of time.

I guess I'll just have a beer while watching Burn Notice tonight. Sounds like an exciting birthday, right? Actually, I think I just answered my own question about 47 - it is old. Getting older sucks, but I guess it beats the alternative.

DO YA

For some reason, this tune always improves my mood.

BABE OF THE WEEK

This week's babe if British model Lindsey Strutt.

SINUS BUSTER ROCKS!

I've been battling a bad cold/sinus infection for about a week. Today I broke down and went for the Sinus Buster. It's like pepper spray for your nose.  It cleared me out better than a week of Sudafed and Mucinex did. And I didn't need to go through the background check/rectal exam they give you at the pharmacy when you buy Sudafed. I love this stuff. It's a bit pricey, but worth it if nothing else is getting the job done.

THIS DAY IN CRIME HISTORY: DECEMBER 4, 1875

On this date in 1875, William "Boss" Tweed, former head of the Democratic machine in New York City, escaped from jail and fled to Cuba. Tweed was facing hard time for his role in fleecing New York taxpayers of millions of dollars (some estimates run as high as $200 million). Almost captured in Cuba, Tweed moved on to Spain. He was arrested there in 1876 by a police officer who reportedly recognized him from a political cartoon by Thomas Nast. He was returned to the United States by Spanish authorities. He died of pneumonia in the Ludlow Street Jail in 1878.

Further reading:

Wikipedia - William M. Tweed

OSU - Thomas Nast

Friday Movie Quote from 1/1/10

FRIDAY MOVIE QUOTE

"In our thing, you get sent for, you go in alive, you come out dead, and it's your best friend that does it."

-Lefty Ruggiero (Al Pacino), Donnie Brasco (1997)

THIS DAY IN CRIME HISTORY: DECEMBER 2, 1993

On this date in 1993, Medellin Cartel boss Pablo Escobar was shot and killed by Colombian police. Escobar, who had been doing less-than-hard time in a luxury prison, busted out when he found out he was being moved to a prison without a hot tub. I guess having enemies brought to the prison so he could torture and murder them was more than the Colombian government was willing to tolerate. Wonders never cease. After Pablo went on the run, the Colombian police formed a special unit called the Search Bloc. The Search Bloc was tasked with only one mission: get Pablo. Which they did. With a little help from US military and intel types.


Further reading:

Pablo Escobar - The Medellin Cartel

Wikipedia - Pablo Escobar

Killing Pablo, by Mark Bowden

TALES FROM THE FAT SIDE

I worked in retail loss prevention for a long time.  I saw some weird shit in that line of work, but this one really takes the cake:

 

EDMOND, OK -- Two women are arrested for shoplifting and police say they used their bodies to conceal the goods. Edmond police authorities say it was at the Edmond TJ Maxx that loss prevention officers found the duo stuffing items under their belly fat and breasts.

They say they took four pair of boots, three pair of jeans, a wallet and gloves; $2,600 worth of store merchandise.

Ailene Brown, 28, and 37-year-old Shmeco Thomas were arrested for shoplifting and are facing felony charges.

Officer James Hamm said, "These two were actually concealing them in areas of their body where excess skin was, under their chest area and armpits."

 

I think the important question here is this: Does the store really want the merchandise back after it's been where no man (in his right mind) has gone before?  Hell, I wouldn't want to buy it.  Not even at a discount.