FRIDAY MOVIE QUOTE

"A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti."

-Hannibal Lecter (Anthony Hopkins), The Silence of the Lambs (1991)

WHAT'S THE NUMBER FOR 9-1-1?

I used to think it was great that it's so easy to call for emergency services.  Now I'm having second thoughts.  Maybe it should be a little harder, to serve as sort of an IQ test for callers.  It might prevent crap like this from happening.  From The Oregonian:

Aloha man calls 9-1-1 over botched fast-food order

ALOHA - For most folks it's not a dilemma. Given a choice between "a day without sunshine" and a day without jail time, most people will skip the orange juice and stay out of jail.

But Raibin Raof Osman isn't most people. The 20-year-old Aloha man had a sleep-over at the Washington County Jail on Memorial Day after calling 9-1-1 to complain that McDonald's left out a box of orange juice from his drive-thru order.

Osman was booked Monday night on accusations of improper use of 9-1-1. He bailed out Tuesday. The offense is a Class B misdemeanor punishable in Oregon by up to six months in jail and a fine of $2,500.

h/t: Drudge

For orange juice?  OK, if it was like a chocolate shake, I might understand.  But orange juice?  Totally unacceptable.  Next thing you know, we'll have some clown calling the cops over Chicken McNuggets, or something.

MONEY ISN'T EVERYTHING (BUT BEING POOR SUCKS)

It's cold.  It's cloudy.  It's rainy.  Yup, today is the perfect day for bad news.  The "your car needs a new thermostat and radiator" kind of bad news.  Yeah, that really hit the spot.  I mean, it's been like a whole month since I put the new roof on my house.  I was long overdue for another giant, and totally unexpected, expenditure.  And unwelcome.  Did I mention unwelcome?

BABE OF THE WEEK

This week's babe is Colombian-born actress/model Sofia Vergara. If you want to see more of Sofia, check out here official website. If you really want to see her in person, you might want to look into buying tickets to Chicago The Musical; she's in the cast as Matron "Mama" Morton.

THIS DAY IN CRIME HISTORY: MAY 23, 1934

She was an honor student with a talent for creative writing.  He was an ex-con and habitual criminal with a preference for Fords and Browning Automatic Rifles.  On this date in 1934, Bonnie Parker and Clyde Barrow were ambushed and gunned down by a posse led by (semi)retired Texas Ranger Frank Hamer.

Crime Library: BONNIE & CLYDE: ROMEO AND JULIET IN A GETAWAY CAR

Bonnie and Clyde at Wikipedia

The Bonnie and Clyde Festival in Gibsland, LA (which is this weekend, if you're in the area)

"The Story of Bonnie and Clyde," a poem by Bonnie Parker

Frank Hamer at the Texas Ranger Hall of Fame

FRIDAY MOVIE QUOTE

"This here's Miss Bonnie Parker. I'm Clyde Barrow. We rob banks."

-Clyde Barrow (Warren Beatty), Bonnie and Clyde (1967)

THIS DAY IN CRIME HISTORY: MAY 21, 1924

On this date in 1924, two spoiled sociopaths committed what they thought would be the perfect crime; all to prove their status as Nietzschean supermen. Nathan Leopold, 19, and Richard Loeb, 18, kidnapped and murdered 14 year old Bobby Franks. They might have gotten away with it, had their perfect crime been just a little more... perfect. But perfection is hard to achieve, especially when you do things like:

-Hide the body where it will be quickly found

-Drop your (very unique) glasses at the body dump location

-Build your alibi around going for a drive in a car that could be shown to be in the shop

It didn't take long for the alibi to break down and for both men to confess. So much for supermen, Nietzschean or otherwise.

Famed trial attorney Clarence Darrow was brought in to defend the indefensible. He couldn't get his clients acquitted, but he did manage to head off a death sentence. Both men were sentenced to life in prison.

Loeb died in prison in 1936, the victim of a razor attack by another inmate. Leopold was paroled in 1958. He moved to Puerto Rico, where worked in a hospital. He died in 1971, at the age of 66.

Further reading:

truTV - Leopold & Loeb

Famous Trials - Illinois v. Nathan Leopold and Richard Loeb

NEXT ON JERRY SPRINGER...

Hey kids, does anyone know what heteropaternal superfecundation is?  Anyone?  Anyone?  That's OK, I didn't either, until today.

A DIETARY CLUE FOR THE CLUELESS

Well, it's about time our intrepid politicians got around to protecting us from... ourselves.  From the Albany Times Union:

Governor wants new rules on disclosing calorie counts

Albany -- Enjoy that slice of carrot cake guilt-free while you can. Gov. Paterson thinks you ought to know that it contains 1,500 calories, and wants a law requiring chain supermarkets and restaurants to tell you about it.
     
It's the new front in the governor's battle with obesity. The proposed legislation, announced Monday at the Capitol, honors a promise from Paterson's State of the State speech in January, and bolsters what the governor hopes will become one of the hallmarks of his tenure: a wide-ranging anti-obesity campaign.

"The legislation will help New Yorkers make better decisions about what they eat," Paterson said. "When people know what their choices are, they seem to make better choices."

Damn straight!  If that law passes, I'll finally be able to find out whether the Baconator that I love so much is really the tasty low-fat treat I've always believed it to be.  I'm sure it is, but it'll be nice to see it in writing.  And if it's not, then I guess I'll just eat vegetables instead.  If I can find any that taste like a Baconator.

BABE OF THE WEEK: SPECIAL CYBORG EDITION

Since this week marks the premiere of Terminator Salvation, as well as the end of Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles, I figured I'd dedicate this week's BOTW post to the female Terminators of the big and small screen. So, for your viewing pleasure, check out this sampling of cyborg babe hotness, times three.

Kristina Loken played the T-X in Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines.


Summer Glau played Cameron, a T-OK715 infiltrator, in Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles.


Garbage lead singer Shirley Manson played Catherine Weaver, a T-1001 liquid metal Terminator in Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles.

MIXED BAG

Today's TV news was a mixed bag of good news and bad. Chuck is coming back next season for 13 episodes. That's the good news. And Fox is cancelling Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles; that's the bad. Oh well, can't win 'em all, I guess. But I would like to give it a try sometime.

The 24 season finale is tonight. Maybe that'll take my mind off the bad news. Hopefully, the braniacs at Fox won't cancel that too. They can't be that dumb. I mean, dissing Terminators isn't too bright. But giving Jack Bauer the shaft? Well, that's just crazy. You don't screw with Jack Bauer.

MONDAY BLUES

I really wasn't ready for the weekend to be over. This song was going through my head on the way to work this morning.

THIS DAY IN CRIME HISTORY: MAY 17, 1974

On this date in 1974, six members of the Symbionese Liberation Army were cornered by police in a house in Los Angeles. The police announced their presence via bullhorn. An older man and a small child walked out of the house. The man told police that no one else was inside. After several attempts to communicate with the remaining occupants, police fired tear gas into the building. SLA members responded with automatic gunfire. In the ensuing battle, the building caught fire. All six SLA members, the group's leader, Donald "Cinque" Defreeze, Nancy Ling Perry, Angela Atwood, Willie Wolfe, Patricia Soltysik and Camilla Hall, were killed in the shootout.



Further reading:

Crime Library - HEARST, SOLIAH AND THE S.L.A.

CNN.com - Patty Hearst Profile

FRIDAY MOVIE QUOTE

"Alright, ladies and gentlemen, listen up. We have a fugitive that's been on the run for ninety minutes. Average foot speed over uneven ground, barring injury, is 4 miles an hour. That will give you a radius of six miles. What I want out of each and every one of you is a hard-target search of every gas station, residence, warehouse, farmhouse, henhouse, outhouse and doghouse in this area. Checkpoints will go up at fifteen miles. Your fugitive's name is Dr. Richard Kimble. Go get him."

-Deputy Marshal Sam Gerard (Tommy Lee Jones), The Fugitive (1993)

THIS DAY IN CRIME HISTORY: MAY 15, 1981

On this date in 1981, Donna Payant became the first female corrections officer in New York State to be killed in the line of duty.  Payant, 31, was assigned to the Greenhaven Correctional Facility in Dutchess County, NY.

At the end of her scheduled shift, Payant had turned up missing.  An exhaustive search was conducted of the prison and the surrounding grounds, but there was no sign of her.  Officials expanded their search to a local landfill where trash from the prison had been dumped earlier in the day.  They found her mutilated body buried in the trash.

Police and prison officials began an investigation into the murder of Officer Payant.  Bite marks had been left, and the medical examiner thought that the pattern looked familiar.  As it turns out, he had seen the same pattern on a previous case he had worked:  one of the victims of rapist and serial killer Lemuel Smith.  Smith was an inmate at Greenhaven CF when Officer Payant was murdered.

Once the case was built, Smith was tried for murdering Officer Payant.  He was represented by C. Vernon Mason (of Tawana Brawley fame/infamy) and William "Black Rage" Kuntsler.  In spite of such big-name legal representation , Smith was convicted of 1st degree murder and given the mandatory death sentence.  In 1984, his death sentence was overturned as unconstitutional.

Lemuel Smith is currently incarcerated at Five Points Correctional Facility in central New York.  He is eligible for parole in 2029, when he is 87 years old.


Further reading:

Crime Library - Murder Within the Walls

Find-a-Grave - Donna Payant     

THIS DAY IN CRIME HISTORY: MAY 13, 1977

On this date in 1977, mob boss Michael "Mickey" Spillane (no relation to the guy who created fictional P.I. Mike Hammer) was shot and killed outside his apartment in Queens, NY.  Spillane, who headed the Westies gang, had moved to Queens from Hell's Kitchen out of fear for his safety.  The previous year, his three top lieutenants had been taken out on orders from Genovese crime family boss Fat Tony Salerno.  Salerno coveted control of construction contracts for the Jacob Javits Civic Center, which was being built in Spillane's territory.  Spillane's killing was rumored to have been carried out by Gambino crime family associates Roy DeMeo and Danny Grillo.  After Spillane's demise, mobster Jimmy Coonan took over as head of the Westies.  Coonan had previously challenged Spillane for control of the group.  After he took control, Coonan formed an alliance with the Gambino family, in a deal brokered by the newly-made Roy DeMeo.  Coincidence?  Um... probably not.


Further reading:

The Westies, by T.J. English

The Serial Killer Calender - Roy DeMeo

Wikipedia - Mickey Spillane (gangster)

BABE OF THE WEEK

This week's babe is actress Mary Elizabeth Winstead, who played Lucy McClane (John McClane's daughter) in Live Free or Die Hard. She also played Lee Montgomery in Quentin Tarantino's Death Proof.

FRIDAY MOVIE QUOTE

"It's just another run-of-the-mill Wednesday. The calendar's full of 'em."

-L. B. "Jeff" Jefferies (James Stewart), Rear Window (1954)

BACK!!!

It was only a week, but it seemed a lot longer. The drive home sucked, as always. But it's over. Now I gotta come up with a movie quote. Hmmmm....

WI-FI DAMMIT!!!

I finally found a wi-fi hotspot at a local library.  The signal's so good, I don't even have to go inside to connect.  It's about damned time, I was going through blog withdrawal.  We have internet access at work, but the net police have blocked access to all blogs, webmail, Youtube, and pretty much anything cool.  By some stroke of luck - or an oversight on the part of the buzzkillers running our network - my comment service is still accessible.  So, if you leave a comment here, I will see it at some point during the day.

It's been a boring as hell week so far.  I attended a mind-numbing presentation on some computer software this morning.  Don't get me wrong, the stuff they were showing us was pretty cool, but my attention span hit it's expiration date long before the whole thing was over.  At least I didn't fall asleep.  Not so anyone noticed, anyway.  The up side to this whole thing is that they let us go work out on "company time."  Gotta find that silver(ish) lining, right?

Friday won't get here soon enough as far as I'm concerned.  Guess I'd better head back to my room and watch some TV on the computer (using my nifty TV tuner).  Exciting life I lead here, isn't it?

BABE OF THE WEEK: ACTIVE DUTY EDITION

This week's babe is actually older than I am (for a change).  Actress Valerie Bertinelli just turned 49 recently.  I'm thinking 50 is the new 30.  Or is that just wishful thinking on my part?

Multimedia message

On active duty this week. Going through blog withdrawal Must...find...wifi... hotspot!!!

FRIDAY MOVIE QUOTE

"I'd like to share a revelation that I've had during my time here. It came to me when I tried to classify your species and I realized that you're not actually mammals. Every mammal on this planet instinctively develops a natural equilibrium with the surrounding environment, but you humans do not. You move to an area and you multiply and multiply until every natural resource is consumed and the only way you can survive is to spread to another area. There is another organism on this planet that follows the same pattern. Do you know what it is? A virus. Human beings are a disease, a cancer of this planet. You're a plague and we are the cure."

-Agent Smith (Hugo Weaving), The Matrix (1999)