SPAM SAMMICH

Here are more tasty treats from my email spam filter:

I very cheerful and optimistical girl
Really? Well I very cynical and pessimistical guy.  Whaddya think of that?

Your last chance
You said that the last time.  And the time before that.

Clinton crossed the line
Again? What did Hillary do to him this time? If she kicked him in the nads again , I hope she videotaped it.

Videos of explosions
Demolition p0rn, my favorite.  Ok, second favorite.

Hola, remember our chat?
Buenos días.  No, no recuerdo.

Your IP is watched
Keep your eyes off my IP!  Pervert.

Catch envious looks in changing room
I better not be catching ANY looks in the changing room.  And keep your eyes off my IP, dammit!

Why didn't you appear?
Transporter malfunction. Sorry. Scotty's trying to figure out what the problem is.

Take the blue pilule and she will show you how far the rabbit hole goes.
Hopefully it goes all the way to a dictionary that has a definition for pilule.

I can't find my love
Your love will be in the last place you look. Just like everything else you have trouble finding.

The magic melody for your ?flute?!
No, thanks. Got anything for a bassoon?

May you live a happy life!
May I?  Please?

From Mrs Elizabeth M.Tinambacan
I know her. She's the lady in Nigeria with $70 million to give me, right? Just leave it in a bag on my front steps. Thanks.

Cialis-new intimae fragrance
A Cialis fragrance? What does it smell like, a hardon?

Climb her hot Everest!
I thought Everest was covered in snow and ice. What gives? Is this because of global warming? Does Al Gore know?

'Taylor the Tailor' helps stars dress for success 49 min
How long does it take to dress for failure

Restless sticking ability is true!
No it isn't. I looked it up on Snopes. Restless sticking ability is FALSE.

I shall write more about myself
Go for it. Science fiction is very popular these days. Fantasy too.

And each of them said, 'How wise we are
And each of them was wrong.

Are you not against closer to dialogue?
I am not against being opposed to closer dialog, provided it's done far way.

I will be happy to learn you closer
Don't be too sure of that.

Make your hammering fantastic
My hammering's fine. Got anything to improve my screwdriving?

I am very single
Usually, "a little bit single" is sufficient.

I has decided to write to you
I is delighted to be hearing that.